The Chopping Block

Have you ever had to "write off" a friend? I have never been in this position before but I have had a friend for several years who appears to be on the chopping block (so to speak).

It is strange. One moment, we were inseperable and now I can't even summon up enough care to drive across town for her. It is odd but I think after being treated poorly by her for a while, I could now give two sh*ts (to put it bluntly). No matter what, though, I am sad for the loss of the friendship we once had.

Four years ago, E. and I moved to Georgia together. It was an incredible experience. She was healing from a breakup in Colorado that left her spinning and I was searching for my career by taking more and more graduate level classes after quitting law school in Virginia. Needless to say, we were attached at the hip. We borrowed each others clothes and lived like sisters. We finished each other's thoughts, cooked together...sometimes it was hard to know where I ended and she began. But then something happened that changed it all.

For the first and last time in my life, I played matchmaker. I set E. up with J., a former law school classmate and they hit it off. Within months they were in love, spending all of their time together. Within the year, they were married. As the months passed, our friendship began to dwindle. I always thought that a healthy marriage consisted of each of you continuing to place imporatance on your individual friendships but apparently this is where she and I part ways.

I remember her wedding as if it were my own and that is only because I considered it *that* important. Interestingly enough, now that I am getting married, she is nowhere to be found. When I announced my engagement to her, all she did was send a text saying "wow! That is fast!" Thanks for your unsolicited critique but a "congratulations" really would have sufficed.

In May, E. and J. welcomed their first baby into the world. I received a text saying that they were going to the hospital. I texted back to *call* me when they could have visitors. I never heard back. Since then I have called a few times to say hello and ask if I could meet the baby but am talking to her voicemail and the calls are never returned. On occasion, I hear from her on Facebook and it is usually an "I like" thumbs-up after my status. Thanks.

So last night I did something I would have never imagined: I erased her number from my phone. I can't be the one making all the effort and I certainly cannot keep a friendship afloat on my own. So, I guess this is what giving a friend the old heave-ho looks like.